We've waited all summer wondering if Lux would get the Kindergarten teacher we hoped she would get. I did send the teacher a little email earlier this summer asking "if I had my pick of teachers for my daughter I would pick you" and received a quick response back "I will do my best to slip her in", and she has slipped her in, along with 23 other rug rats. 24 kids in one Kindy class that seems frighteningly big for me, big for her and big for the other 23.
But she got her teacher, did I say that? Jen Anderson and also got 3 other kids she knows quite well in the class, including one little girl that she is good pals with and is a super sweet kid and a close neighbor to us.
One more week, its hurtling towards me, and while she seems ready and Geoffrey seems ready and everyone seems ready, mom's not ready, I doubt Huxley is ready and this sort of seems like the beginning of the end, when we force ourselves to leave the very comforts of our homes each day and trudge off to work or to school, to manage difficult personalities, difficult settings etc - and we call it life. I sort of think it sucks when you're 5, when you should be able to slpep at home with mom/the nanny and your brother, have the odd playdate, odd outing and enjoy the comforts of your own bedroom, enjoy a nap, sit on mom's knee, do a craft or two, eat lunch, watch a little tv, go for walks, play with your brother...
We have a lot to pack in on weekends now, more than before. And pack into the evenings.
And I see her off, my heart aches - I want her to have the very best, to have a life filled with hope and opportunities, of love and kindess and sympathy and compassion, of adventure and laughter, and I know that I can give her all of that and more at home, but now need to open our door and let her run out and find whatever it is out there - with us beside her, but not always, but always in hearts.
She is mine (I know this) but she is profoundly special kid. She said to me last night after I said "our lives are very full because of you, we always have an outing to do, a celebration to be had" and she said "no mom its because of you guys". Lux, its because of you, always has been you and always will be you.
I'm wishing you the very best for a happy and fulfilling first year of school.
So I've now my tears, hopefully they won't show up next week in the classroom, or if they do, I will slip outside unnoticed. Because she won't cry.
xo.
But she got her teacher, did I say that? Jen Anderson and also got 3 other kids she knows quite well in the class, including one little girl that she is good pals with and is a super sweet kid and a close neighbor to us.
One more week, its hurtling towards me, and while she seems ready and Geoffrey seems ready and everyone seems ready, mom's not ready, I doubt Huxley is ready and this sort of seems like the beginning of the end, when we force ourselves to leave the very comforts of our homes each day and trudge off to work or to school, to manage difficult personalities, difficult settings etc - and we call it life. I sort of think it sucks when you're 5, when you should be able to slpep at home with mom/the nanny and your brother, have the odd playdate, odd outing and enjoy the comforts of your own bedroom, enjoy a nap, sit on mom's knee, do a craft or two, eat lunch, watch a little tv, go for walks, play with your brother...
We have a lot to pack in on weekends now, more than before. And pack into the evenings.
And I see her off, my heart aches - I want her to have the very best, to have a life filled with hope and opportunities, of love and kindess and sympathy and compassion, of adventure and laughter, and I know that I can give her all of that and more at home, but now need to open our door and let her run out and find whatever it is out there - with us beside her, but not always, but always in hearts.
She is mine (I know this) but she is profoundly special kid. She said to me last night after I said "our lives are very full because of you, we always have an outing to do, a celebration to be had" and she said "no mom its because of you guys". Lux, its because of you, always has been you and always will be you.
I'm wishing you the very best for a happy and fulfilling first year of school.
So I've now my tears, hopefully they won't show up next week in the classroom, or if they do, I will slip outside unnoticed. Because she won't cry.
xo.
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Oh Claire, now I have tears. I loved this, very well said. Lux will do great as will you. We love you all.
ReplyDeleteAs I carried you through the Denver airport when you were 3 days old your Mom and Dad talked about their hopes and dreams for you and what kind of a child they hoped that you would be.You have turned into a wonderful little person who makes us all feel proud that you are who you are.
ReplyDeleteOver the years kindergarten parents I have met always mentioned the thing that mattered to them the most about their child's first school experience...does the teacher like my child and do they have friends? Well Lux Columbia there is no doubt that Ms. Anderson will love having you in her class and that you will come home after the first week talking about all the new friends you have made at school.
Like your Mom, I will have tears in my eyes just thinking of you going off that first day in your usual way...full of hope and promise. We can hardly wait to hear how you like it.
Love, Nana
I agree with your mom Lux makes friends so easily and is such a sweet smart child any teacher would love to have her as part of their classroom. Just as with the twins on their first day, I will cry some thinking about how fast these first 5 years went and be excited for her and all the fun new experiences ahead of her. If Huxley is anything like his dad (and he is) the first day he will wait by the door waiting for is big sister to come home and play with him. Can not wait to hear all the exciting news Lux will have to tell about her adventures in Kindergarten. It is harder on the parents then it is on the child. Take care I will be thinking about all 4 of you.
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